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This too shall pass - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

It is said an Eastern monarch once charged his wise men to invent him a sentence, to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and situations. They presented him the words: "And this, too, shall pass away." How much it expresses! How chastening in the hour of pride! How consoling in the depths of affliction
via en.wikipedia.org

how ture for all of us

Four Approaches to Forgiveness, Ranging From ‘Cheap’ to ‘Genuine’ | Neuroscience and Relationships

Premature forgiveness, she notes, is at best a ‘cheap’ substitute as it does not require the participation of the person who acted wrongly to make amends. Genuine forgiveness, Dr. Abrahms Spring argues, is a more in-depth process that involves the person who acted wrongly, and places the onus of responsibility on them to make amends. Simultaneously, it frees the person wronged to have the option to not forgive the other
via blogs.psychcentral.com

A good article that takes a look at the different approaches to forgiveness and the impact that thay have on us and our relationships.

For more information about counseling and psychology, check out my site at RMarcAndrews.com

A Simple Way to Trick Your Brain Toward Mindfulness | Mindfulness and Psychotherapy

Acclaimed author and teacher Thich Nhat Hanh uses short phrases all the time to support himself in being more present, grounded, and aware in daily life. He has taught this practice to medical professionals, psychologists, and students for many years now. He teaches the practices of walking and/or breathing and using these phrases to support us in calming our distressed minds and being more present to every day life.
via blogs.psychcentral.com

Take a look at the suggested phrases in this article to help you to be more grounded in your every day life.

For more information about counseling and psychology, check out my site at RMarcAndrews.com

10 Thoughts that May be Stressing You Out | Dialectical Behavior Therapy Understood


Much of the strain and conflict that causes stress in relationships occurs when your wants are consistently side-lined by your internalized sense of how you should behave.

Are you stuck “doing the right thing” while sacrificing what you want? Often, we’re stressed out not because others are expecting things from us, but because we expect them from ourselves. These internal “shoulds” may have originated in external expectations, moral codes or rules that you internalized long ago that have now become pressures you place on yourself.

Do you relate to any of the following thoughts:

  1. “I should solve problems on my own (not doing so is weak, needy or means I’m inadequate)”
  2. “I shouldn’t make requests from other people (it’s selfish and self-centered)”
  3. “I should just deal with it.”
  4. “I should sacrifice my needs for others.”
  5. “I shouldn’t feel the way I do.”
  6. “I should change my attitude.”
  7. “I should have done better (at work, in a relationship, on a task)”
  8. “I can’t fail (failure would be disastrous)”
  9. “I can’t handle criticism.”
  10. “I should never need to be criticized (I should behave perfectly so that there is no need for criticism)”

When you carry around a heavy load of internal rules—“shoulds”– you become worn down and burdened by your own expectations.

Try picking one thought that you’re willing to let go.  Look over the list or identify a thought of your own that contributes to your feeling overburdened and overwhelmed.

With that thought in mind, try one or all of the following:

  • Notice the thought, when you have it, and imagine it drifting in and out of your thoughts, like a cloud drifts across the sky. You might watch the thought “I should sacrifice my needs to others” come into your mind, drift by and float out.  Don’t push the thought away or try to engage with it. Just notice it is there.
  • Think the thought, but change the word “should” to “could.”  If it’s a thought with the word “can’t” change it to “I feel sad, disappointed, anxious, when I.”  Notice if the word change has an impact on how you feel. For example, you might change “I should just deal with it” to “I could just deal with it.”  This subtle shift can increase the flexibility of your thoughts and expand your sense of having options.
  • Imagine doing the thing you “should not” do and in your image, imagine a positive outcome.  For example, if you tend to think “I should not need help,” you might imagine asking a neighbor for help.  Now imagine that while the neighbor helps, you begin chatting and end up developing a new friendship.
You can find more strategies to improve how you feel in my new book, The Stress Response and by clicking here to sign up for more of my tips and podcasts using DBT strategies to improve how you feel.

Worried woman photo available from Shutterstock.


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From Psych Central's World of Psychology:
Best of Our Blogs: April 17, 2012 | World of Psychology (April 17, 2012)

River Park Psychology » 10 Thoughts That May Be Stressing You Out (April 18, 2012)


    Last reviewed: 17 Apr 2012

APA Reference
Matta, C. (2012). 10 Thoughts that May be Stressing You Out. Psych Central. Retrieved on April 18, 2012, from http://blogs.psychcentral.com/dbt/2012/04/10-thoughts-that-may-be-stressing-y...

 

via blogs.psychcentral.com

If you do, take a look at this article to see how they may be effecting your relationship

For more information about counseling and psychology, check out my site at RMarcAndrews.com